Can You Handle the Temptation? – Romance in the Philippines

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169 comments

  1. Kuya Henry. Looked like u were standing on a ledge or sumthing. I was like “no dont jump” ha, jk. Yes youre right kuya. So many women here in the Phils. Just a buffet of women good lookin and not so good lookin. Haha… youre doimg great, kuya. Keep up the good work. Lyn’s a keeper.

    1. @TokTokCali Vlogs thanks, man.  and yes, she’s quite the wonderful g/f.  there is much more to her than i first observed, in a good way.

  2. Fifteen guys in the USA are now GOOGLING Dumaguete City and trying to findout how much it costs to fly there after watching this video. Your on a roll Henry, two very good videos in a row. You must be very happy with Lyn. Keep up the great videos and my philippina wife and I can’t wait to see your next one! /////

    1. @David Puissegur she is quite the keeper from all i’ve seen so far.  must be, to forsake all others in order to have her.  that’s how i want to feel about a woman in my life.   🙂

  3. Hi, very interesting view on mindset and perception. You see it in people that visit for the first time, either want to marry the first girl that smiles or chase everything. Your advice take it slow and don’t cheat or at least be honest. Your videos are great Henry.
    Regards Wayne.

  4. Oh My ! If my hubby were still alive he will enjoy watching this and going to tell me for sure.
    In the Phils. Temptation is sad inevitable !!!!!

  5. Very interesting. All it seems is that you have matured during this relationship. Good for you, enjoy this new found love and maturity. Best of luck with this relationship and your new life in the PI !!!!!!!!!  Your very lucky.

  6. I enjoyed this video. I kinda feel like that I’m your age and feel like time is running out. I have this mind set like I need to find I need to find. But it opened my eyes and mind. Thank you for that. I wish you all the best with your new sweetheart:) peace too you and her.

  7. hmm okay – the idea of living in South East Asia appeals to me greatly due to climate, food, culture and geography — however I rarely find Asian women attractive unless they are a half european half asian

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines RHOK , You see a great many half/half pinoys on TV ,,, ABS/CBN and in their beauty pagents , I suspect it’s an “exotic” look to them … I prefer the pure filipina (islander/hawaiian/malaysian) look myself… As Reekay says there is NO SHORTAGE of women…

    2. Brother RHOK, do yourself a favor one day and go boots on the ground for just a few weeks.  The PH is a veritable smorgasbord of female yumminess.  No matter what your freak or speed is, you will find it here.  “Hardenup” will have new meaning for you!  LOL.

    3. @buckslaw that’s funny… Actually if you in the Philippines you don’t have much choice those backpacking girls coming from India I’m not exactly dating material..

  8.     You have only dated women for short period of time in the Philippines. Hopefully, your mindset does not change after dating a woman for a year or two. I find long lasting relationship more rewarding. 
       There is a flip side to your video. There is a scarcity of foreigners for single Filipinas. It can clinging behaviors on their part.

    Richard

  9. Sounds great ! You never know what life will bring us. It certainly appears as though you’ve found something to be happy about. Good luck to you both !

  10. Would be interested to know your thoughts if you brought a girl back to your home country and the likelihood of a relationship survival and the temptation she would have, while a western man is desirable in the Philippines, a beautiful  Philippina would be hit on all the time, a role reverse from the Philippines. 

    1. @Johnny Pastrana Years ago Dr. Dean Edell reported on a study of marriages between American men and so-called “mail order brides”.  He cited the same overall divorce rate as you but found that the “mail order bride” marriages were at a drastically lower rate.  His thought on that was they were more committed. 

      Consider, if you’re willing to travel thousands of miles from home to find a wife and she is willing to travel back thousands of miles with you while forsaking family and friends then I believe that, yes, the two of you are committed to making it work.

      Realize also how much a Filipina gives up to go to the US.  Very family oriented yet she’s willing to leave them behind knowing it will probably be years before she sees them again.  And what about her husband?  Once in the US will he be kind to her and continue to love her?  Or will she be stranded thousands of miles from home with no support.  Scary situation.  Men don’t often realize just how much a Filipina has to give up and as well as place a tremendous amount of trust in you. Like life in general, it’s a two way street.

    2. Johnny, I find a 50% rate to be so unbelievable as to be laughable.  I have no idea what this attorney has told you.  I can only relate my own experience which I have already done.  Draw your own conclusion.

    3. Au contrere mon ami. I have been married to a Pinay for over 25 years. Brought her to the US and she never strayed or left me. Through both thick and thin. We know or have known many FilAm couples and I can safely say that less than 5% have split up. And in the majority of those it was the US man who caused it.

    4. @King Kev honestly, the odds don’t look good.  yes, many do bring their filipina wife back to their home country and all is fine.  but many end up in a predictable script of.. waiting until the new citizenship is secured and then, divorce, take the assets and begin a new life with a younger man or taking the assets back to the PH.  add to that the bigotry against age-gap relationships in western places like the usa.. it doesnt look good.  me, i plan to stay in the PH.

  11. Hi Henry,
    Depends sooooo much on the individual. I do get what you are saying. Me I am so far a serial monogamist…wouldn’t have it any other way. There is another angle to this whole story. Best left for another time.
    Take care and keep on keeping on, especially with your new honey
    Fred

  12. I don’t think love exists for all people. Certainly not for me. It’s all about money. You, may not feel ‘scarce’ but many Filipino women feel that way. The reason you do not feel scarce, is because you have money – – and in that society, money = power. 
    If you truly want to find someone who loves you – tell the woman you are with, that you are poor and have no money… See how long she sticks around. 

    1. Women won’t good providers especially from Philippines 1 $ a hour if they can find a job. If I cant sponser her what good am I to her. Plenty of Philippine men who cant support there children or don’t care to know them. Philipina women like any were else no money no honey.

    2. I used to feel a very similar way as you did. However, this weekend I had an experience that showed me how to not only have a truly unexplainable longing for another individual, but also how to love all those around me ^.^

    3. A man must not be in denial, for sure. He must know why his lady is with him. If it’s for money, she is a HO.

      There’s nothing wrong with a good HO. The problems start when a man is in denial, and attempts to make her a mother and housewife. You can’t make a HO into a housewife.

    4. @Jason Wilson Lucky you, SCAM requests do NOT count against your FICO score.  

      But who gives a shit?  In the new Amerika with part-time, low-wage incomes, it’s not like a high FICO score will be necessary or do you any good anywho.

      Be the ultimate Balla’: pay CASH!  

  13. Great video Henry , I’ve been married to a Filipina for almost 10 years and it has been great . I think that Filipina’s are just traditional women . They make you feel like you are the most important thing and really take care of the family . I no people who are married to American women who walk around like zombies . They are so beat down . I think you will never be able to go back and date an American women . You have seen the light .
    Also if your an older Guy in America you are not getting the pick of the litter . You are getting the old used up left overs . And in America older men are treated like tits on a Bull . In the Philippines American men are doing things they wanna do . All the best .

  14. henry, u found a great girl love her , care for her .sure there’s plenty of other woman but are they going to be special like lyn . be happy in your choice . if it don’t work out than look . sure everyone loves the eye candy but look don’t touch . lol.

    1. @morefeouse no.  i checked the census numbers and male/female numbers are almost at 50/50.  however.. the number of ‘desirable’ men is very, very low here.  filipino men have a huge reputation as cheaters or drinkers, or both.  many filipina women want nothing to do with such men and would rather stay single.  so.. that’s why there are so many attractive, single filipinas available to foreigners who are considered more mature, better educated, independent leaders and financially secure.

  15. Time will tell with me Henry but I think I can handle the temptation because I’m more the one Woman type guy! If that bond is there then there is no reason to stray! Just my opinion!

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines You are a wonderful person Henry! Lyn is very blessed to have you for a partner. (but I’m sure you are blessed too)  🙂  So true ! Being a  filipina ,I  strongly believe that faithfulness is all that matter for  lasting relationship. means  love and respect! Treat Lyn well and for sure  In return she  will be your devoted loving wife forever. Enjoyed watching your videos .Good luck to both of you.  

    2. @Stephen Stromack aside from financial stability.. the biggest asset a man can attract a filipina with here is; Faithfulnes.  fidelity is worth gold with these women.  they will do just about anything for a kind man who will never cheat on them.  faithfulness in a man is a filipina’s dream come true.

  16. I fully understand that with living in the San Francisco bay area. And seeing the difference when im in Cebu with my g/f .. I had to catch my self many times from looking at all the beautiful woman there..

    But there’s a big calmness I feel every time im there and with my g/f

  17. The Philippines suits you well as it seems that you want an attractive, likely young, woman who is kind, sweet and committed.  They are abundant amongst Filipinas, even here in the USA.  Being in the Philippines puts you in the perfect place to find one. 

    If your tastes change and you want a career oriented 65 lbs overweight woman who demands your complete obeisance, the US is the place to be.

    1. @Tim O ha!  trust me, before i met Lyn and i was wondering if such a single woman existed with my parameters in mind.. i was prepared to simply stay single in the ph the rest of my life before ever considering going back home for any of that action.  🙂

  18. I have been around filipinos for more than 20 years and my ex wife is a pinay.I underderstand where you are comming from Henry and tend to agree with you.I do see a difference in culture from years ago to now.On a whole or average you are right on when you explained about pinays.Also when you explained about MEN being Non filipino and Filipino when it comes towards pinays.I still find them wholesome lovable people ,faithful when it comes to relationships.

  19. The Dynamics are surely different, here in the USA with the issues of relationships is that women have POWER,  THEY  dont need a man.  Even in the USA, if you have money, power, and looks, still is not easy to find a mate,,,, Surely helps, and its the main reason,  Just those three things,  everything else is secondary etc.   And i have to agree with some of the other comments here,  Lets be honest guys, im in the same boat,  as you get older in the USA, you are worthless to the society and most women even closer to your age dont really want anything,  even if some of those dynamics are fulfilled.  
    I mean there was a guy here on Youtube, i forgot who he was in his 40’s saying he could land a 20′ something in the USA, thats BS, i am 49 and i have nieces that age and they  consider me an old fart for their friends, and mind you , i have a career, never married and no kids, ,,,, Ideal conditions for a country like phils, but not in the USA..   so GUYS, wake up , smell the air, and speak the TRUTH. …Henry, your blessed with those conditions there but here you would not succeed in it or lets say your chances are very slimmer, as well as all the Expat there, ( as our mine) not trying to bash anyone , just trying to be open to the reality that exist.   They have a different culture and value people who are older etc,  and they have a need for  a better life and see it in a foreigner…   And believe me i have ALWAYS dated  younger women then me in the USA(10 +)…. but its getting to the point that i cant do that, just cuz they think i am too old for them , when im really not, but thats the life and perception here in the great ol USA,,   i know somehow i will have my future there, for the same reasons you guys are there for and then some.  Peace and be happy,,   Good Luck with Lyn Henry,,  i really wish you success in your relationship,,,,,,  Just making a point and adding my 2 cents

    1. I went to marriage counseling alone after my marriage ended to understand if I needed fixing. The counseler told me, you built the nest, you filled the nest, you are not needed now. Our society will make you pay for your exwife to have true love from your children and party like a teenager.

    2. @BenFern kay something in the air it must be the typhoons blowing the air toward the east. One thing I have to remember is not to play prince Charming and save damsels in distress I’ve never succeed in that.

    3. @DemocracyDoctor1
      Hmmmmmmmmm……You mean the game of lust isn’t being played in the Philippines also?  Material stuff and money don’t count with these young ladies?

  20. Very interesting perspective of male psyche… and a very interesting environment you are in, “abundance of choice”.  Hard to imagine !!!  I have lived in north America for past 40 years and the only (white) Americans I dated were my first two and got turned off for good.  The sad reality about American women is that not only they lack soul, intelligence, and personality but a great majority of them (in my opinion about 70%) they turn to a sack cellulite and fat after age 30.  And that’s why it’s so hard to find a decent woman in America. So, my advice is to appreciate your find and be grateful for the blessing.

  21. Your point is very true to the comparison to women in the Philippines (PH) and US.  I wonder if there are more women to men ratio there in PH.  Getting to know someone takes time, and you still have to make considerations for the relationship no matter where you are.   Having an understanding woman to your interest as a Man is the key to a successful life to gather, but time can even change that course if the two of you do not stay on the same page.   Most important think in life is to be happy! Congrats on your new love together!!

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines so the Filipino girls will not date a man who is a cheater, gambler and drinker. I guess its back to rehab for me.

    2. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines  Hey Henry-Thanks for the clarity on the comparison ratio.  I know that Filipino people are very friendly and the women are very beautiful.  These are some of the primary reasons why I look to schedule a return vacation. Always Great Videos!        

    3. @Lo Seattle on the ratio, here’s how it plays out.  i checked the census numbers online and the number of same aged filipino men and women are almost the same, just about 50/50 with about 2% variance.  however.. if you break it down to “desirable mates”.. a ton of the filipino men fall off the chart.  i have lost count how many filipinas have said they will never date another filipino man again.  cheaters, gamblers, drinkers and lazy come to the top of the list. and of those who are not any of those types, majority of them are, well.. poor. marrying a poor farmer’s son means signing up for guaranteed poverty in the province. so.. smart filipinas hold off on marriage and see what better option may come along.  the only filipino men considered ‘desirable’ are those with education, class and financial stability.  and trust me, those are in the minority.   so what does that leave the society with as we expats get off the plane?  lots and LOTS of single, attractive, even career women filipinas who have already decided that the majority of filipino men hold no attraction to them.

  22. Yeah Henry, please stay faithful while you are in a steady relationship. Your conscience will let you sleep at night peacefully. Cherish what you have now. If it doesn’t work out then you can start anew anytime because there is an abundance of choices.

  23. Some times when I watch videos and hear what the author says I think there is no reason to write a comment, other times I have to resist the tempation to reply to some asinine statement, and other times I eagerly want to reply out of interest of the topic, whole hearted agreement  to it, total disagreement or just playing devil’s advocate. In reference to your last couple of videos, as I stated months ago, I think you, like some people, cannnot be alone for long, always in need of any companion for at least a while. You appear to be a clingy type of person to me and I don’t think it is solely a sign of affection but maybe possesiveness and like in the past, I think your fealty and wandering eye may continue to be issues with which to deal.  Also resisting temptations aside, I think statements about the abundance and availability of women in the Philippines infers that one could acquire an indifference toward maintaining a sincere, healthy relationship because replacing a partner is an easy option.

    1. @Jon M i enjoy being in a relationship.  i don’t apologize for it or see it as ‘clingy’.  anyone who knows me in person knows that if it’s just not working out, i will have a conversation and then walk away.  i’m as concerned about giving in a relationship as finding anything i think i might need.   a person ‘could’ take what i say about abundance and be indifferent or even be a complete jackass in their relationships.  but that is a problem with their ability to process information.  i’m just standing on the hilltop, looking around and reporting what i see.

  24. Henry…I don’t think there has ever been an abundance of available women in the US. If all the single men in the US see your videos, there will be…hahaha…I plan to beat the rush…Thanks for another great video…keep them coming

  25. Henry.great video!!your open & frank comments are refreshing.
    I am sure most will agree with your comments if they have been to PH & I also.
    Keep up the great site.thanks

  26. good video once again. Having started going to Philippines in 1983 and many times since.. have to say the place is a candy store.. shhh keep it a secret for a bit longer!

  27. The people of the Philippines are just so hospitable. I work in a resort here in Hawaii and I keep telling others here that the customer service in the Philippines is on a another level. That is one of the reasons we keep visiting every year. But yes, I agree with your abundance observation. In my opinion, the money, way to “get out” and religion factors also play a big role. The “buffet” of women is unbelievable. Stay safe and healthy my friend.

  28. Absolutely delighted for you about lynn. Hope that she is the one.  Been watching and enjoying your videos for a while now and visited Dumaguete last Jan/Feb and stayed in the Essencia which is a lovely place. Best wishes for the future…James from Ireland.

  29. Henry, you’re observation about the scarcity of quality women to date in the states I believe is accurate, but you will probably feel the wrath of some women. There are wonderful women in the U.S. but not many in circulation because any guy with half a brain will make their relationship work because they know… scarcity is a reality. The scumbag men that do cheat and mistreat women, ruin it for the rest of us. The unfortunate result is emotional baggage that often gets brought up too early and too often in the dating scenario. American women need to filter this habit, it’s a huge turn-off and an indication of an inability to let go of resentments. And yes, I’ve dated Asian women and they rarely drone on regarding the “He done me wrong” topic. Kudos to those couples who are in a loving long-term relationship. 

    1. @Jason Wilson I don’t “decipher.”  I won’t be giving “them” a call.  I like someone that says what they mean and means what they say.  Archaic values at best, but I’m old school.  LOL!

    2. A friend of mine who is 59, got married this past year. He does most of the cooking and cleaning voluntarily but when he would like help at times, his new bride reflects on a failed marriage that ended 20 years ago. Since the other guy was an asshole and didn’t appreciate her efforts around the house, why does that give her a reason to not pony up now regarding domestic chores? If given the opportunity, I do see why older men want to be with someone younger.

    3. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines Run for the effin’ hills!  LOL!  Soooooooooo much better to be single and at peace rather than with one of those old bags!  LOL.

  30. When it comes to beautiful women, it seems to me like the Philippines can be like an endless buffet that is constantly replenished. Some guys try to sample everything that looks good on the table and spend their whole time at the buffet sampling a little bit of this and a little bit of that, keeping the portions small so that they have room in their stomach to try as many different dishes as they can. Some guys take their time to carefully select the best item on the table and stick with that one. The people who focus on 1 item from the buffet say things like “you’ll never have the chance to fully appreciate all that 1 buffet item has to offer if you’re too busy taking tiny bite sized samples of everything on the menu… The people who want to try as many buffet items as they can say “what’s the point of coming to the buffet if you’re not going to sample as many items as you can?” neither approach is “wrong”. Different strokes for different folks, I suppose. I can say that a guy should never fully commit until he believes 100% that he has reached his peak with the girl he is with. If a guy honestly believes that he can’t do better than the girl he’s with then, and ONLY then, should he settle down. In a place like the Philippines… That’s a pretty tall order for a guy. If a guy feels like there is a chance that he might be able to possibly upgrade to a better girl then he shouldn’t be ready to take himself off the dating market. When I hear a guy in the Philippines say that he is 100% committed to his Filipina it’s like hearing him say that in his mind, the Filipina that he is with represents the best mix of beauty, personality and attitude that he can attract in the Philippines. It’s one thing to have casual fun dating and sampling the buffet items … But the Filipina you allow to actually take you off the dating market is an indication of your own worth because you are saying to yourself and to the world that she represents the best combination of beauty, personally and attitude that you feel you can possibly attract.

  31. Henry, I just read your reply. Interesting, intelligent and thought provoking as always. You are the best. You are an inspiration to us all. No matter where you’re journey takes you; if you post it, I’ll follow it. There are a lot of people out here routing for you to succeed.

  32. Again a good video Henry making me want to be there sooner lol…. In my experiences as well, American women tend to want to “change” us into what they think we should be. I’m not into being anything other than ME, plain and simple. Work hard, live life, be monogamous, and forge ahead!

  33. I was just watching some Travis Kraft videos and was nicely impressed with his wife(?) Imabelle’s language skills and the way she presents herself. She seemed to have the necessary maturity to have thoughtful viewpoints and also the ability to express them (in English). Obviously a college grad that took her studies seriously. One wouldn’t need to ‘dumb it down’  or be a fatherly figure toward her. For me, that would hold more value than the physical attraction of youth.

  34. Oh well Henry…you seem very stressed in this video and some very deep soul searching..Let me start…first and the only words that really matter now is GLOBALIZATION and the INFORMATION AGE
    40 years ago..none of this made sense we were both 11 years old. Why should it we were 11..but little did we know that years later it would change the social forces that allow us to mate today.

    1. American women due to the changes in labor and education..don’t just have Power..
    They have CHOICES…CHOICES that give them an equal footing. Women in America really don’t have to worry about SATISFING us men anymore. Through mass media…most American women believe no matter what class she comes from her ideas may in time, propel her into great wealth. We all know that may not true..but its the preveilling thought and women operate very
    deeply on hopes and dreams. So now the information age has given them advantages,
    They dont need to marry to survive anymore, which means on the dating level they will be picky or near hopeless to mate with. This is present day America…An extreme FIRST WORLD COUNTRY THAT IS GLOBALIZED.

    2. The Philippines is where America was 30 years ago..but with the Internet, a homogeneous religious society and homogeneous cultural make up for the most part. The Philippines is a SECOND WORLD COUNTRY RAPIDLY APPROACHING THE EDGE OF BECOMING A FIRST WORLD. It is not Globalize no where near to what America is for that reason, women in the Phillipines still think marriage provides some form of survival..for religious reasons and just plain lack of cultural shifts. Do you really think this will continue on this trajectory 30 years from now as it completely becomes first world and globalized? Do you think Women will continue to think this way there ?

    http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/business/01/24/12/pinoy-men-more-likely-be-unemployed-women-ilo

    3. I disagree with your reasons for not cheating but on these grounds..It not about scarcity vs plenty..but about you meeting a woman who i BELIEVE IS SATISFING YOU.
    I am a firm believer that if you are being SATISFIED and you have half a brain..you will not stray..this assumes you know what you want and can perceive you are getting it. I do believe you on this…you have not been satisfied so much till you struggle with realizing you got it.

    If you get podcasts check out this episode of one of my favorite radio shows. …RADIOLAB

    http://www.radiolab.org/story/91640-choice/

    Hang in there…i enjoy your videos

  35. Oh…Henry….you just can’t get your mind off the Ornery North American Chick.  Forget them and build a life with the woman of your dreams.   I have had 32 years of ornery and 5 years of tenderness and faithfulness. I like the tender,faithful years better…..And the brown skin.
     

  36. you and I appear to be brothers from other mothers, close in age and life experiences in many ways and coming to much the same conclusions about life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Kudos on another GREAT video!

    1. @Jim Simmons the good filipinas throw themselves 100% into a relationship.  the bad ones, they always have a plan B and are usually entertaining it simultaneously.  :/

  37. The Philippines seems to be a great place to live, especially for those who have lived in English speaking countries. Henry is right, we should take the best that life has to offer. I think that being with a woman of a different culture is so much more interesting because there is so much to learn from each other. On the temptation side, it must be an overwhelming experience for those who have met a filipina on a dating site. Some will fly all the way across the world and meet one woman that they have skyped every day but never met in the flesh. Once in the Philippines, how do they walk around without being able to turn their head when surrounded by beautiful women? My point is, even though they may have spoken on Skype for 18 months or so before meeting, it must be very difficult to focus once they arrive and see the abundance. I could see this as being an instant issue that would cause some friction with the woman they have flown out to meet. Let’s be honest, we can’t all walk around wearing those blinkers that race horses wear. It seems like the best way is to be patient and wait until you get there before making any commitments to one only. On the other hand a Filipina pen pal could be useful for cultural learning before making the trip.

    1. @Paul johnson There are areas in the PH out of “typhoon alley” that are much less “exciting” weather wise.  Black-outs can be mitigated with simple technology, also.

    2. Like Henry says
      “Life’s a Trip”
      With people like Henry making these videos at least we get to see and hear true life facts. I am sure they are saving many potential ex pats a variable financial fortune by imparting all of their knowledge and experiences first hand. I guess as Henry said “the best thing to take to the Philippines is patience” (with a degree of flexibility).

    3. Yes I would be inclined to agree on your first point D Doctor. I myself like many others have been married before and raised children into adult life so have experience of serious relationships. I will retire twelve or ten years early so my views are to take a new direction in
      life, and the Philippines seems to offer what at I am looking for. A nice climate, friendly people many places to visit, English language spoken, warm sea, developing cities offering good shopping malls, medical care and of course motorcycles and beautiful women. I will be prepared to live with changing weather conditions and browmouts. As for time, will have

    4. And that’s why I say NEVER go to the PH solely to meet a lady, Brother Paul.  Of course you will look at the yummy “menu,” even if not partaking.  

      You must come to terms with all this loveliness before you have a chance at even choosing one, much less getting into a serious relationship.  This takes time.  Sometimes a lot of time!  LOL.    

    5. @Paul johnson very good observation.  which is why i stress the same advice to not build bonds or commitments with filipinas that are only known online.  avoid the online dating sites until arriving and then use them to meet women within a day or two, in person.  just walking through any mall there are more choices on any given day to keep a man busy for quite a while.

  38. Got in last night from Hong Kong, was in Baclod and Boracay with my wife for 2 weeks. She is still there but will  be home in 3 weeks, I spend at least 6 weeks a year in the Phils dated 2 women from there, will give the naysayers their due on the goldiggers but my wife has my back like no one ever did before, she is all in with me, she could go off on her own because she has a permanent green card now but she never would she adores me and cares for me in a way no Weastern woman ever did.  I couldn’t deal with an American woman’s selfisness, my wife has 5 sisters and they all take care of each other and of course their parents.  If you spend any significant time over there and come back here it is impossible to date here again. Oh and if your curious, I am 56 and she is 39 but we never think about it unless someone brings it up.

  39. Your a smart man really Henry life is good to you im old and no one likes me much now ladies I mean im to fat hahaha nice video thanks for that information

  40. I was hoping you’d take that little gopro on a stick around to randomly show us lonely kanos some of this “abundance” you’re talking about. hehe. 8 weeks until I arrive with my new gopro hero4 silver!

  41. If you feel happy and are enjoying life with Lyn, then focus on that. Don’t worry about the what if’s or the maybe’s. If you do, you’ll never be happy or be able to maintain ANY relationship. You have to decide, do I want to be with a girl that I care about and want to make happy. One that makes you feel complete. Or do you want to be a punter living in Angeles City for the rest of your life. That’s the decision you have to make.You obviously want to be in a relationship so give her some time and see what the future will bring. If it doesn’t work out, then move on but focus Sir, focus.

  42. All guys here can relate to the scarcity mindset. Guys who deny it for the most part are lying to themselves. For myself it took me a good 2 years before my eye wasn’t always wandering. Interesting the kid n food scenario you mentioned could apply to some bar girls where its never enough. They need to acquire as much as possible ,however, they don’t save it:)   -Cheers

    1. @sodthong okay, that’s better.  so what you’re saying is that in your observation, 75% are bad news.  (by just saying ‘filipino women’, it’s a statement on ‘all’ filipina women)   one thing that may affect those numbers is how many of those guys with bad marriages were in the military.  military guys are notorious for having short leave overseas, rushing into marriage with girls near the ports (bargirls and opportunists) and then going back to active duty.  it’s the perfect storm for a failed marriage.  in fact, opportunistic women ‘want’ a guy in the military because they get all the benefits of an american husband, but without having to actually behave married while he is away.

    2. I married one, and know alot of guys that married them. Over 75% were taken to the cleaners within a few years. They think everyone is a cash cow. Hope that helps.

  43. Thank you!! This was helpful. It is also applicable to people with low self esteem, or whatever. If you will eat tomorrow no matter what, no need to hoard food. Also, kudos to you for the volunteering. This video is helping me to actually try to pull the trigger on the whole pinay dating thing. It also gave me some perspective on wives number 1 and 2 where I rushed. You’re a good guy for doing these videos. Thanks!!

  44. The woman are great ,ive been with my wife for 28 years from the phillipines , It,s the inlaws which are the ploblems they will milk there familly members who marry anyone with money ,there brainwashed from birth to support all the brothers sisters .if you cheat on your partner and your a forigner they will find out with the bamboo tellegrath and then it will cost you more money cant win with them dont cheat dont give one more than the other ,things will be sweet .great place to retire, im from australia and australia is getting far to expensive.There great girls ,but you need to understand there ways.

  45. Oh my God , I am 60 she from Luzon ,she is 58 very happy shit Henry ,she looks like 40  We go there , not interested in other women. I am sure my Wife will keep me on a short leash. I love your vids. Adelina is my soul.. She is home sick . WE  have to go . I do this for Her. Carl and Adelina from Bullhead City , AZ USA. Love ya man , good luck .. Be cool bro !! keep safe and God Bless.

  46. Congratulations!  That is a very mature perspective; I am thrilled for your security and success.  I’m excited about and looking forward to my emigration.

  47. I can relate to your take on American women, as for me my Filipina wife is awesome….there is no doubting her love for me….trust is good…all the good things that should come with a relationship.  Thanks for the video….best to both of you…

  48. If you have options to fall back on in case something doesn’t work out you have peace of mind. Whatever it is in life investments, relationships, travel plans ect it’s great if you have options to fall back on in case something doesn’t go to plan.

  49. Very nice video, thank you for sharing your thoughts.  As for myself I am very much like you and believe in true love, soul mate for life time relationship.  I did meet some one on-line chat on Skype and the first thing she asked me was for money for having Skype at her home, and wanted 3699 pesos.  I did not continue with her.  I have a question for you and that is “What are the reasons for abundance of women in Philippines” .  I do not know anyone in Philippines and do not know where to go? 

  50. A lot guys bullshit themselves by saying they want a relationship when they actually don’t. By doing that they find excuses for dumping one after another. I cam to an honest realization, just admit it and quit screwing around with decent women. Find and date hookers until you get serious. That is really an unethical game that guys play with good women because they can’t deal with the whole ‘bad’ girl conscience deal..

  51. I was married 3 times ….if the first one was the philpina lady I have now …it would have been only once……the ladies in north America……are mostly too chunky in mind and body….overfed and overindulgent

  52. Wow, Sparrow’s Gate. I used to deliver produce and bread to them that we would truck down from San Diego. We would deliver to several other orphanages and families as well, spending time at each place. Took about a 24 hour total round trip. Great memories, and small world.

    1. +LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines I would like to go back and revisit those places and people as well. People I know who have spent time at Sparrow’s Gate, the experience really stuck with them. I don’t remember meeting a Nurse Volunteer there. Unless my memory is off, this was all 10-16 years ago. The two main orphanages we went to, one was kind of on top of a mountain, with two valleys on either side of it, really big place, and there was an American nurse who lived there with her daughter, and I got to know her. Sparrows gate I remember being the smaller place, closer to Tecate. No memories of a nurse unfortunately, but we often got there very late and had to wake up the missionaries to receive the food.

    2. +Seikowski V wow, indeed. i haven’t heard anyone else who knew where Sparrow’s Gate was since back in ’93. i was visiting the old location (former pig farm) for the year before they were building the newer location. i made one trip to tecate later in 2000 and met with one of the girls who was by then having her first baby. did you ever meet jennifer, the nurse volunteer? i often wondered where she went to after spending so much time there.

  53. Fortunately lived there almost 3 years and managed to leave single. Not many of my cohorts did. Some are still married but most are not. Lust is often easily confused with love… Gotta be smart enough to know the difference…

  54. Great video, I’m glad that I watched it ! I find myself rushing in also…… because there are few truly good solid women here in the US….. When I return for good… I will have goals for myself and stick to it .. because I find myself changing my plans to their situation …..which they could be using me … some are really good at it, most I find want to improve their situation, can’t really blame them for that….but I think that would be my down fall…. the philippines can be overwhelming, hard to stay focused with them sometimes ! Thank you for all the advice it has really helped a lot me there!

  55. I would make a comment, have erased 3 already. Let me say my life with my filipina wife is my secret treasure. I don’t want anyone else to know where I found it hehehehe

  56. An abundance of opportunity is an understatement, however there is also an abundance of opportunity for a middle aged man to get burned if he does not play cautiously.
    My last visit to Cebu was for six weeks, to visit a younger woman, whom Ihad really felt a lot for.
    As I could not remain in Philippines permanently at that time, we decided to stay in touch through skype, however, that long distance relationship seemed to peter out, only after a few months and despite my efforts, she began to contact me less and less.

    Still although there were many opportunities to flirt with other women Filippinas at that time, I felt that I had no want to be with anyone but her.
    Despite my buddies in Bogo in northern Cebu,( they must have thought I’d gone spare) virtually sitting me down next to some absolutely beautiful filippina women whom seem to be available, my feelings were for my long lost far away girl friend. I was in love and missing her.

    Reekay is so spot on…as when I consider that here in Sydney Australia, young sexy women of about 20 or so years of age, at shopping malls., just look right through me, as if i were made of glass.
    Travel north to Philippines, I could not believe that, within a week of being there, I was receiving text messages from women whom I had barley been introduced to.. the day before inviting me for lunch. Not only that, I found that walking into town, Id be getting smiles and winks from younger women. Still..Id prefer just one good woman..whom I could share a happy existence with and not stray from her( I might notice other women) but would want to be faithful to her long term. Year I hear you Reekay..join the long quew of middle aged guys wanting to settle in Cebu..lol

  57. i enjoy the way you balance out your prospective good and bad and the depth of each thank you I am 53 and looking to marry Gen 24 1 child. i have always been looking for one faithful Godly woman. in the last video about age difference you helped me to give up the problem with age. as a man that tries to follow God you have impressed me when you said you dated but would not allow yourself to be alone with them. i will be following your videos If i can treat gen properl because of them it is a blessing to me Thank you Bill

    1. thanks. i give the best advice i can, based on principles and what is practical here in the PH. but i hardly consider myself a choirboy. as a general rule, if a man is seeking out a long-term relationship or marriage, ‘courting’ a woman is the best route. which includes a chaperone at the beginning of the dating process, but not all the way into it. at some point they need privacy to discuss personal questions about the future. (kids, which country to live in, how close to parents, expectations, etc.) but i am very glad to hear that things are going well with your relationship. filipinas deserve a good man who will give them the respect and love so many there deserve. i wish you both well in your journey.

  58. Old habits die hard. Women are hard to figure out, at least at times. Church and schools are great places to look for women. Hospitals are places with good looking, educated women. My Filipina is educated, and after 42 years, I would not change her in the least. I am very, very blessed. May you be as blessed. You seem to be doing very well with your relationship. I got good advice once, “take it slow”. The advice was good then and I think the advice still holds true. Win win is great. You do not have to settle for second best when you have picked the best from the crowd. Again, your video provides wise council. You feeling secure brings a lot to the relationship. God bless!

    1. thanks. i tend to think there is a reason for things turning out the way they do. if/when the time comes, i will have the right filipina companion in life.

  59. I realize this video was made long ago, but I just came across it and it was beautifully put. You are saying what are in a lot of potential expats minds. I too have had trouble being faithful in the past, but not because I actually desired the other women necessarily. It really is a squirrel gathering as many nuts as he possibly can for the winter type of mentality. There is a desire to not only have other women for backup, but also to prove to yourself you’ve got what it takes to attract women, since attracting women in the United States is rather difficult. I totally understand what you’re saying, and I hope once I visit and eventually moved to the Philippines, I can develop an abundance mentality. Thank you for your videos!

  60. I have a question: it seems to me that Filipinas don’t have general knowledge about science, music, arts, Nature, Geography or anything – what is your experience?There is no much common topics to talk about with them.Thank you.

    1. having things in common is not what makes for a solid relationship. common goals in life, yes. but if you really want someone who has a lot in common with you, date a woman from your own country who is your own age. see how that works out. but if you want to date a younger filipina, you must be prepared to mentor her in life. if you can’t do this, don’t date one.

  61. a retired, assured income US male, in the Phills, old enough to not cat around so much, is a BIG deal for a filipina. You can get buried in them, literally, with one little ad on date in Asia, once you are in Manilla

  62. you make alot of sense my friend i’m 60 percent disabled would it matter to the women thewre im a 45 year old retired iraq war vetran i’m a light skinned blk guy ive had several philipina girlfriends from directly from the philipines i’m from california

    1. i know several expats, some married to a filipina, who get around in a wheelchair. check out a channel called, “sit down perspective”.

  63. Like you say in some parts of California they would not give you the time of the day In the Philippines it is definitely deferent in that way right now I live in Europe in northern France next to Germany . Basel so I been watching your videos to get me started in the Philippines from [email protected]

  64. I got one Philippina I don’t see a alternate if this girl dont work out I’m probable done with them girls. There expensive to sponser from her if there lucky to make 40$ a week in a mim wage you feel blessed. I do love this 30 yr old ps. I 64 I will sponser her child family tell she prove me wrong . I know here long enough to know how important most of her family is to her. I dont see a scammer after yr and half of video chat. Thanks ReeKay’s another good video.

  65. Righ on Henry.
    Western women, aside from having no respect for a man are mostly just stuck up money grubbing bitches who expect to be served. Phillipina’s, the good ones are the most loving faithful lovely women on the planet.
    Only a scumbag decieves and cheats on a good woman

  66. Things are the same in other parts of the world , the Caribbean, Africa, South America, YOU THE AMERICAN CITIZEN ARE THE PRIZE, WOMEN DON’T CARE ABOUT MEN IN THE STATES BECAUSE THEY HAVE SO MANY FREEDOMS, JOBS, WHATEVER, THEY CAN DO WHAT THEY WANT, BUT OVERSEAS WHERE IF A YOUNG BEAUTIFUL WOMAN MEETS A FOREIGN MAN WHO HAS MONEY, STABILITY, IT’S LIKE YOU ARE MICHAEL JORDAN, YOU CAN HAVE ANY WOMAN YOU WANT FOR THE MOST PART, YOU ARE CONFIDENT THAT IF THINGS DON’T WORK OUT WITH ONE GIRL, SO WHAT!!!!! THERE’S A 1000 MORE WHERE SHE CAME FROM AND THEY ALL WANT THE STABILITY THAT THEY BELIEVE WILL COME WITH THE AMERICAN MAN, IT’S NOT BECAUSE WE ARE SO HANDSOME, IT’S ALL PRETTY MUCH ABOUT MONEY AND RESOURCES, STABILITY.

  67. Hi. I know this comment is years ago but I just came across this video. Filipina has scarcity mindset too. A lot of our men has no ambition, just get drunk. Just live for today. Also they do hump and dump that’s why a lot of Filipina are single mom. And a lot are playboy and cheater. As to the professional men, they don’t expect their wives to be house wife, but they still expect you to be the one doing the household chores and take care of children. And be very beautiful if not, they will cheat on you. My friends are actually telling me that I have to expect that my bf will cheat on me someday. But I don’t believe her cuz my bf is a unicorn.

  68. Beautiful Filipinas everywhere, but my GF takes such good care of me, why would I consider stepping out? She is 30 years younger than me, good looking, attentive, great cook, and makes sure I stay happy.

    At this point things are great.

  69. American women don’t dedicate themselves to a man nowadays. They always have their eye open for something better. This leads to a feeling of something lacking with the man in the relationship. Therefore, men have to have a plan B in case of a breakup. In the U.S. everybody breaks up. Okay, that’s an exaggeration. Sure the same thing can happen in the Philippine, but at least while she is with you she makes you feel like you’re the only man in the world for her.

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