Making Big Decisions in the Philippines (or anywhere else)

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83 comments

    1. Hey Henry, I agree with everything you said. Before I met my wife I talked to many girls online, and I have heard all the same stories about why they need money, its endless. I met my wife through a girl I was talking to. She was this girls best friend and when we decided that it wasnt going to work out, I kept in touch with her best friend, my wife. We talked on and off for about 3 years until we were both free of the relationships we were in. Then we started to talk seriously and after a year of planing I brought her and her daughter to the US. Now we will be moving to the PH this month and thinking about Dumaguete as a place to live, but will be in CDO short term. Maybe we could have a beer when I get there? Have a good evening
      Tom Clark  (TC)

    1. John, the answer is “NO.” Having been a police officer for 25 years, I do that stuff all the time. I always attempt to talk the guys out of it. I explain that if you’re ready to spend that kind of bread to have her surveilled for days, even weeks, you obviously do NOT trust her. So if I come back with a “clean” report,” does that mean you’re going to magically trust her, again? Of course NOT! Hell, you know her much better then I ever will. I mean unless you’re just a paranoid control freak, if you’re getting a feeling that something ain’t right, you’re probably correct.

    2. @John Strabismus many guys do exactly that.  they can be hired online.  the issue is finding a good investigator, who can ask the right people without tipping off why he’s asking.

  1. Living in the Philippines is NOT dating filipinas! It is living among different kind of people, personalities  as everywhere. To handle with care you/we should really know different kind of people! I mean filipinos, filipinas different ages and different kind of backgrounds to “read” them. Even in the province it can be now the same bc of internet cafe`s and laptops. Just have to meet a person in live and what the better meet her family and relatives, friends, neighbors and church member etc. Then you can build a picture which might be quite close and you can trust on a person, maybe much sooner than 1 year but if you want to waite…it`s a BIG plus, so NO rush! We did met 3 times in Phils and 3 times in my home country far away to get to know ourselves as 2 grown up people with our experiences of life. After that engagement rings and some months wedding rings…not yet sufferings after 7,5 years together. 

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines Also the time after you first “face to face” times apart each others can be very very useful that you can separate your feelings “I cannot live without her/him!” I would recommend to propose then when you`re sure about your emotions as well as the facts what you both want for your relationship! When you know that it`s NOT a risk, whatever will happen in a future, if you live happy ever after, if she will die in a car accident or for some disease OR that you just “get tired” of the life in a paradise or what ever! Marriage is a very serious matter and “contract” between 2 people to stay there and work for it on a “rainy days” too, as it rains a lot in the Philippines also! I love you! I`m sorry, forgive me! etc. are the words in every relationship we cannot use too much!   Good luck and God bless for us all!

    2. @Leo Löppönen yes, the time spent together allows for meeting the family, seeing the background there, the kind of friends she hangs out with, her reputation in the barangay.. all of this is helpful, but not available on-line.  quality ‘face-time’, as much as can be had is so helpful.  and even after all that.. in the end we all have to take a ‘risk’ when it comes time to actually getting married.   🙂

  2. Henry, My wife & I took almost 2 years getting to know each other before we were sure we were right for each other
    We met online through one of the dating sites
     
    Online dating was new to me but I think it really worked well for me
    Lots of time to ask questions and feel things out
    By the time we met in person for the first time we were like old friends
    I met my wife there in Cebu twice in that two years and we are now together here in America

    I can tell you I met SO MANY online it was such a challenge
    So many gorgeous women so easy to lose your sense of direction! lol

    Some I suspect were men posing as women who said they could not afford a webcam! lol
    Many were sad cases just looking for money to survive

    But I can tell you when you least expect it that ONE will appear out of the many

    I hope one day soon we can return to the Philippines together so I can experience life there

    Hang in there guy your ONE is out there!
    You have the right approach

    Hope to meet you one day

    Don 

    1. @Bxman53 i’m always glad to hear of successful marriages.  🙂   as for me, despite all the recent activity for me, i am in a content place.  i have an even better idea of the kind of person i’m looking for.  🙂

  3. Hi, you speak simple, good sense there Henry but it’s amazing how many guys get drawn into the whole big romance of it all and lose all sense of reality and logical decision making. By the way, I’m coming back to the Philippines in a few more days for a month’s visit. I was last there 25 years ago, when I was a mere 25. I met a girl of 20 years old back then in Manila and after spending 3 months with her, decided we had no future so we went our separate ways amicably enough. Thinking back, I believe I was just too young for her at the time!  I don’t have any specific women in mind there again just yet but I’m thinking about making it my home in the near future. Keep up the great work there, you write and speak on video with great eloquence!

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines Really Henry, hate mail and everyday at that? I would never have thought that at all. I can understand some people not agreeing with something you wrote but not to the extent that anybody would send hate mail. Is the hate mail from different ethnic groups or is it all from Americans? That is so crazy. Hope all the positive things people say outweigh any of the negatives. Although I may not always agree with your opinion I do appreciate your efforts to provide information about the Phils and it’s people. You do a valuable service to those of us who have yet to visit the country and also to the many who are away from their homeland. Know you are appreciated by many. Thank you Henry and stay safe.

    2. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines
       Hate mail! You’ve got to be kidding? What in the world is there to hate? Certainly not you? I been holding back but let me say right now. There are a ton of websites and videos from people over there. I just found the guy with Michelle, Channel. (It’s ok. Probably more watch for HER than anything else) But with all due respect YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST OF THEM ALL!  Not because of who they are; most likely fine people. But YOU give SUCH INSIGHT, SUCH BALANCE, with such humility and a genuine concern for all invloved; the Filipina & the Foreigner. Your videos have covered EVERY TOPIC OF IMPORTANCE IMAGINABLE. Two weeks ago I found the Banking videos; OMG. that cleared so much up for me! My Father 30 years ago divorced my Step-mother took his money from the sale of the house and went to the Philippines. BEFORE INTERNET & ALL. Everyone thought this Black Man from Gardena California has lost his mind! He bought back a young woman who was a GEM! They were married for 20 years and he was the happiest I ever known him to be, until his death in 2003. Now, I don’t have him to ask a lot of questions, but I do have ALL OF YOUR VIDEOS and insight and I am thankful for it all. I was there back in April, this year spend 3days in Cebu, 3 weeks in Bacolod  and a month in Siquijor (which is where I am headed in two months) oh and yeah, and one night in Dumaguete when we missed the ferry for Siquijor and spent all that time with one PRECIOUS, BEAUTIFUL AMAZING WOMAN. Most of what I was prepared for was because of your videos. PLEASE KEEP DOING IT AS YOU SEE FIT AND DON’T GIVE THE HATERS ANY THOUGHT!

  4. Ok, how can I contact you personally about some questions. I have been following you fir a while and would like your input on a.situation. The bottom line, is it didn’t work out in the states. I wanted more than what she wanted . I am looking for an Asian / Filipina woman because I am getting tired of American women and drama, head games and just overall fear of starting something.

    How much money do you think it takes to live comfortable over there and are the jobs there easy for teaching English. I do have my Masters degree. Thanks for any advice you have

    1. Thanks for the comments,  I want to find a job overseas, but also a nice girl lol.  I know a little selfish, but I want to be truthful.  Has any heard of Oxford Seminars that help you teach overseas?  Thanks 

    2. @george brett My relative who is a professional teacher, young mother of 2 children, did teach online Japanese people every day. She did earn about 12000 PESOS!/month…So that is what also George Brett is saying, next to nothing for a “western people”. University is much better but almost only options for to survive is having your own worldwide business or so…..sad but true!

    3. @george brett Thanks, I am going to check into Korea or China,  I was also thinking about Japan, but I have no experience teaching english.  I am going to be getting my cert in the next 6 months.  I am currently a sub teacher and going to get my teaching credential in 2015.  A little selfish side of me hopes to meet a significant other overseas lol.  Thanks for the input George 

    4. @Paul Cardoza you can contact me on facebook, search me at; ‘Reekay’.  i get a large volume of messages (i spend about 2 hours each morning trying to keep up), but i will do my best.

  5. Whether its $10,000 or $10.00, giving it to someone you don’t know…really??? When one allows another person to play on their emotions, target their weaknesses, and find their vulnerability, they will surely get SCAMMED!! Could it be the old “it can’t/won’t happen to me” syndrome… Pardon me sir, but is this a photo of you in my dictionary next to the word “FOOL”?

  6. Over the decades, I’ve kept meeting people who wanted something serious — I was best off saying right away, “Stop.  I don’t know.”  I really DID not know.  How can we know?  I agree with you … best to slow down, wait, think things through.

    1. At LEAST a year. You want to see her character NOT when times are good but when shit goes sideways. Anyone can maintain during good times. But when the shit hits the fan, then you really get to know someone’s true character.

    2. @edwinodus that is a risk they have to weigh out.  and as adults they are free to take that risk or not.  i’m sure many men have lead filipinas on with no intention of following through.  me, i’m careful about my stated intents because i’ve broken too many promises in my youth, these days i weight out my thoughts before vocally promising anything.  that’s why, to me, honest conversation is so important when i deal with a filipina.  if i’m willing to be honest with my intentions, i expect the same honesty in return.  and that.. has been the real trick in this arena.  sadly.

    3. @edwinodus when she showed her shock, she understood.  but her timeline (and that of most filipinas) is to get to the altar much, much faster than us westerners are accustomed to.  getting invited to “meet the parents” by the 3rd date is not an exaggeration, at all.  i’ve lost track of how many parents of girls i’ve met because it’s part of the whole first few dates process here.

  7. Henry, I’ve been following you for some time now. Sometimes I comment on things or I might ask you a question or two, but mostly I try and enjoy you posts and videos. However, lately it appears your entire focus has changed from being Philippines centric to filipina dating centric. Your posts and videos have become almost a soap opera for all the world to see. Is this good or bad? I don’t know, but I finding myself unable to listen to many things you speak about, when in times past I could not wait for your next upload. Just a few thoughts my friend!

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines I think we are all interested in what Henry writes otherwise we wouldn’t be here. I agree with some of his opinions but not others. The same can be said about the comments of  his readers.We aren’t always going to agree with each other that’s life but to be hostile and attack someone for their opinion only creates an uncomfortable, negative environment. Allow for civil discourse and freedom to express albeit possibly divergent, opinions.

      I agree with both K Williams and pmafterdark to some degree. This is Henry’s site to do with as he wishes but but also, although I like to hear his general views and advice on relationships in the Phils I don’t think it’s necessary nor maybe even relevant for Henry to share so much info about what I consider to be private details and feelings about his personal relationships. Someone made a valid point, something to the effect that maybe Henry actually wants advice and input from his followers about things happening in his life. Perhaps that is true, maybe like all of us at times, he just wants to vent about something bothering him.

    1. @Mike Anderson pretty simple really, ha!  us westerners see tanned filipinas as exotic and wonderful.  meanwhile, in SE Asia.. being ‘tanned’ means you are out working in the sun.  “white” skin means you are indoors, elite.. rich.  add to that the whole ‘Baywatch’ perception of ‘white girls’ and of course they’d do anything for a white g/f.  but, as luck would have it.. not that many women relocate overseas with the same intentions as older men so, you rarely see those couples happen here.  i’ve seen it maybe 3 times in two years.

  8. That was a good one,I agree a year is just about right and that is my thing to,1 year is not long really and like you said it only take a few months to see something funny,or the story changes,thanks 🙂

    1. @MrMongo321 i agree.  it’s a matter of degrees.  online.. very easy to get lied to.  in person, you have a bit more data to observe but, could still get fooled.  that’s why the best weapon is Time.

  9. As one subscriber mention, yes it’s true that Henry’s recent videos have been relationship based, but let’s think about this for a second. If your a single guy, who moves to the Philippines in search of a new life with a special someone, there is a good chance you will be seeking advise about dealing with relationships with a filipina/filipino.

    There are hundreds of videos on YouTube showing everyday life in the Philippines and what you can expect when you move there. But very little in the way of dealing with relationships. I can see how someone who is already married to a wonderful partner would skip relationship based videos posted by Henry. But for those of us who are or will be in the same shoes as Henry, these videos are a goldmine of do’s and don’t about dealing with long distance relationships. I think everyone, male and female, would be wise to view these excellent videos. 

    Even if the information he talks about is common knowledge, sometimes we need to hear it from someone to reconfirm what we already knew. 

    Keep up the great work Henry. 

    1. YES YES, I agree I LOVE these videos. Hell, even us in relationships still need this. I watched the jealousy videos frankly I could NOT understand what I think is such irrational behavior from my own girlfriend! So, when I watched THAT I had a bit more patience and compassion from where she is coming from. So it’s good even if you have gf.

  10. I think a lot of people get involved with online dating (if there is such a thing … rolling my eyes) because they’re looking to fill a void in their current life … but aren’t in a position to act on it in a meaningful way just yet.  I truly have empathy for those people, but you can’t throw common sense out the window.  In almost all of those online situations, you have nothing to gain and everything to lose … definitely not for me.  There are those rare exceptions.  I do personally know a couple that met online and they’ve been happily married for 5 years … she never asked for … or accepted a single peso.

  11. Henry, when I heard about the lonely heart that sent money to build a house with what I think, maybe a girl 30 years younger ( as a rule ), I was shocked. Some say, you should not talk about these type of things. Now what if you never had a blog-slash-advice videos, how many nice guys–slash — too nice for their own good would there be in the Philippines?
    I will bet in total you saved the lonely hearts millions of dollars in total. I think you should keep the good work you do, going forever. You are needed out there.

    1. I have a friend who bought a girl a house, farms, and a lot more.  She had other guys and they are not together today.  He had hundreds of warning signs, but just kept giving.  Henry, you  did a nice video on Mr. Save a Girl.  There are too many western men who want to believe all Pinays are sweet and innocent.  Only in fairy tales!  I still love Pinays and the Philippines!

  12. Hi Henry, my wife and I met online while she was working in Hong Kong.   We took about ten months before we got married.  Well, twelve years later we are happy with one 9 year old daughter.  I hope you find the love of your life.  I am not a religious man but when I was alone I asked God to help me find the right woman after being single for 18 years.   Good Luck Bro.

  13. Great job Henry , Ignore the haters , If they don’t like your site they shouldn’t watch lol. Maybe it gives their small meaningless lifes something to do Haha .  !0,000 ouch. If these guyz want to meet a girl on line I would make sure she was available 24-7 to be on line . come on even cell phones have Skype these days and the net isent that hard to find there. Do your homework boys . Im sure someone will have something negative to say but oh well . Take care Henry and thanks again  Aloha

  14. I’m a tight wad, so when some woman asks for money the answer is usually no thanks. I was at a bar [in America] and some woman asked me if I wanted to buy her a drink, my reply was “Don’t you have a job?”, she said “YES” I then said “Then I guess you can afford to buy your own drink”. She went off to find another sucker. If I were to do the online dating thing, I would be dealing with at least 20 women and if they were asking me for money,the answer would be no thanks and I would go on to say,  I wouldn’t have any money left to feed myself like a king, and man oh man I do eat like a king. 

    This guy who sent $10K, and I know I’m going to sound like a real jerk here, but he was just a fool. I have heard about guys sending even more money, they were also fools and suckers. Unless you have a REAL relationship with these women then the rule is NO MONEY!!!!! By real relationship I mean you can touch them in person and you have spent hours at a time with them in person, you have met their family in person, you have picked them up from their place of work in person. Online is just that, it is virtual reality, it is not the real world. 

    These guys who are doing the online dating thing have to get it straight in their heads that in all likelihood their sweetheart is corresponding or skyping with a boatload of guys, and you can’t blame the women for doing it this way. It is a numbers game, if a woman from the Philippines does want to marry a man from another country she is going to be dealing with a large number of guys in order to increase her odds of getting what she wants. Some of these women are going to be scammers and that is what these guys have to come to the conclusion of. These guys should also be dealing with a huge volume of women and ferreting out any scammers along the way, any woman who asks for any amount of money should be refused the money and or cut from your list of “Girlfriends”, any woman who tries to appeal to you on a sexual basis should also be looked upon as a scammer.

    Imagine it this way she is dealing with 200 guys, and she asks all 200 for a 50 dollar loan [in the Philippines, loan means gift, it will not be repaid], lets say her sales pitch is kind of bad and she only gets 25% to pay up, that is $2500 she has made. Some guys dump her, some hang around, she plays the guilt trip with some and gets some money later. She will keep the real suckers around for the long term and increase the number of guys she is scamming. She will even rotate the guys she hits up for money, some guys will send her 50, 100, 200, or 500 dollars. They are her gold mine and she will treat them special, way down the road she hits them with the $20K for the house or heart transplant or what ever goof ball story she has used in the past that has worked.

    Henry your analogy at 4:40 is quite correct, I knew this guy who after seeing a woman for a short time exchanged ATM cards and pins. I told the guy he was out of his mind, he insisted he trusted her, you can guess how the story unfolded. It’s one thing to be the gentleman and pay for dinner and a taxi ride, it’s quite another to give her money for any reason, and really and especially after knowing her for a short time.

    Sorry for being so long winded.
     

  15. Some good points here Henry- however I think a little luck also
    helps in meeting the right girl. Online is a very good way, if you
    can see her on YM, and or Skype, and can read “body language.”
    Some girls can become such good scammers, they are willing to
    play you and 20 other guys at the same time, even over a 5 year
    period-they are “patient and methodical.’ Most guys would figure that
    after 5 years–“she must be serious”-buy such is not always the case.
    This is quite well evidenced by your story on the guy who sent $ 10 K.
    Most girl scammers give up in the first few weeks. ( or earlier)
       My cousin met this Filipina online and talked to her for about 3 years,
    and was growing impatient, wondering if he’d ever meet her?? Her
    sister had sponsored her into Canada, and she told him it was just a
    matter of time before she would get there.
       Anyways, one day he got a phone cal from her– he thought she was
    still in the PH, and calling him from there. He asked her where she was,
    and she said she was at the airport here in Canada, and wanted him to
    go pick her up. He couldn’t believe it, and just about fell out of his chair,
    as he waited so long for her. After 5-6 years now they are still living here
    together and very happy. ( this is a very true story–I’ve mer her and him,
    both together) He had told me about her 3 years before she got here.
      Moral of the Story- a little luck sometimes helps !!!

    1. Grant Bedart Also filipinas they know what they want! Lol! Very nice, true story which gives a lot to think for ourselves too!  Even with the small money filipinas can do a lot, as they have a TRUST on themselves and God almighty! Your cousin did find a pearl from the Philippines! Say greetings to them from a as lucky guy from Finland!

  16. while I haven’t yet had the privilege of visiting Philippines fair shores, I’ve always been able to wholeheartedly agree with your philosophy and suggestions on relationships in general and particularly with filipinas.
    The whole culture seems to be based on a rush to the altar and it seems most women-at least those I’ve talked to online are caught up in that whole gambit…
    However, I’ve met and maintain friendship with a few notable exceptions and have had some great conversations with these ladies regarding life, love and cultural differences in all kinds of areas from social customs and decorum to diet and religious holidays etc.
    Bottom line is just as you have outlined multiple times already: be open, clear and upfront what your intentions/expectations are and if they accept you at face value fine-if not there are many many more attractive pinay ladies eager to meet you on your terms!

  17. Henry you seem to be struggling. Try finding a girl online, who is from the dumaguete area but is now working OFW overseas. The girls who are now or have worked OFW make better wifes than the local girls who have never been out of the country. You can meet the girl when she comes back to dumaguete on vacation. ,,,,,,,,,A future video idea. Go to the Scoopies across the street from Lee Plaza. The little internet cafe on  the second floor over the Chow King.,,,,,,Go up there about 6:30 am on any morning and look at the girls dressed up from the waist up.Peak over there shoulders at the guys in the USA on the SKYPE connection. The girls all look dressed up for there one and only penpal in the USA and the guys look dead tired because it is night time in the US. ,,,,,,, As they are talking online you will see them “manage” there other penpals on there I Phones thru TXTing.  It’s so pedictable it’s almost funny!    I used to tell the new guys Dumaguete, “don’t buy anything more expensive than a double cheese burger your first 6 months in dumaguete”. Sadly few took my advice. Good luck with your search from the USA ! ///

  18. Things could be worse for people looking for a partner in the Philippines . They could be looking for a partner in the USA . Ha .
    Been married to a Filipina for 9 plus years . I would have to say things have been great . We live in the States . All the man I no who are married to American women are just beat down . Some of the man that are single , that I no will not date American women because they want and can not even cook , clean and etc . Don’t mean to get off topic lol. But my point is Men are better off with Dating in the Philippines then dating in the USA .

  19. Yes, Mark, I copy. I have a lady friend in Manila that works for the tax department. YES, she knows just about every scam going in the Philippines, plus she is 55 years old and has 3 daughters and one son.
    We chat every evening for about an hour. She told me to never think most girls in chat rooms are good little girls. She said they laugh at guys thinking they are male studs. I ask what percent she thinks are running a scam? She said she has reason to believe about 75% of the girls make a living from scamming. Some with 3 and 4 guys on the money string.
    She said the police are watching chat rooms and western guys dating underage girls.
    I did not know the degree in terms of money and was shocked with Henry’s INFO!
    I shutter to think if Henry did not write a blog and explain how not to do things in the Philippines.

  20. I really enjoy your videos and your insights, so I hope I’m not going to offend you here. My response in your situation would be to help this young woman find a woman therapist and a support group so she can get the personal tools she needs to overcome this problem as soon as possible. She needs your help, but it seems to me you are letting her solve this problem on her own, which is usually too difficult for a person to do on their own. This woman sounds like a “keeper” who just needs your help right now so she doesn’t keep suffering from the abuse and keep thinking that all men are like the man who abused her.

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines
      I admit to wanting to see you find a “keeper”…maybe I watch too many Korean romantic comedies… 🙂 I also have two daughters who are now 43 and 44, so my desire to be a good “Dad” comes out when I hear a story like this.

    2. @Will Norell right now she’s still in the province, no such counseling services there.  she plans to move to cebu in a few months, her sister lives there.  i’d say her sister is the best person to convince her to attend counseling.  in the ph, the usual reaction is to just hide it all, pretend it never happened and ‘move on’.  (happens in usa, too)  

  21. that sucks for your friend no 2 gotta feel bad about that but it does seem he was a lil naive and should have met her first.always sad wen that happens.
    how about this Henry i agree start a relationship with for approximately a year before any big decisions BUT if you have been in a long relationship online with a girl and meet her after a few years biulding the rapport i say it will be safe to wait 6 mths before any big decisions. plus most scammers online would leave leave you well before a year if you werent giving them any money.
    Graeme

  22. another thing to note wen dating a filipina dont go rushing to buy her a kareoke machine cuz most nights they invite all their friends over and sing very loudly even wen when you come home from work n just wanna relax n watch tv.
    nah jokes all good my fiance and her friends enjoy it its all good lol.

  23. Henry pretty much covered all the basis, here.  I would add his financial restrictions to “at any time.”  LOL! 

    Re the gentlemen from Texas: I didn’t think anyone could be that foolish anymore, with all the information available on these scams and scammers.  He was buying HER a house to live in!  LOL.  

  24. Henry,

    Although my decisions in life are completely opposite to all you suggest I still love to watch your video’s 🙂

    The big decisions I made …..?

    I met my girl online.
    After 1 time chatting on Skype I asked her to marry me.
    In the same week I support her to go to college.
    The next week she got a new house.
    Some month after her whole family going college.
    Decided to visit her in Bohol.
    Went twice.
    She got a motorcycle.
    She got all she wishes for in life.
    Then she came to The Netherlands.
    We are a true family.

    2 years later we still together, even more in love then ever before.

    Everyone has his own story in life.
    I will never regret my big decisions.

    Pieter

    1. @Pieter Nierop my mom and step-dad met on a saturday.  they got married five days later on thursday.  they were married 38 great years as a model marriage, like two peas in a pod, rarely away from each other’s side til he passed away from cancer, and even then they were looking into each other eyes, holding hands when he passed.  it does happen.  despite the odds.   🙂

  25. Henry, I really like your little video blobs, but it occurred to me sometimes I expect to hear you say, bless me father for I have sinned and these are my sins for the week. I hope you get the humor. I do like your blogs they are really helpful to me and my Asawa. Thanks so much. Hope you can find something stable there.

  26. It’s a sad world we live in.  That a man can send $10,000 to a person on the internet that he has not met in person ( not even sure if he’s dealing with a male or female)  speaks to the amount of loneliness and isolation that some people are facing in Europe and North America.  Somebody should set up a site giving lessons on “How to approach a lady for the shy, or socially inept man”.  People are setting up “for pay web sites” along with their Youtube blogs and an enterprising person might be able to help these (mainly) men who get caught up in the dream of finding somebody, wasting their money and hurting their feelings into the bargain.  They might even be able to find somebody closer to home with bit of tutoring.

  27. Hello Henry, looking good there. 🙂
    I just my two cents on the topic if I may.
    Speaking as a Filipino and as a man, I’d like to ask everyone the following:
    If you met a girl in person, in your own country, would you trust her outright?
    Now even if you’ve known that girl (in person, in your own country) for some time, would you just loan her money to buy a car, house or whatever?
    When you’re relationship with that girl has been going on for years, does that guarantee that she wouldn’t have something on the side?
    Granted that the chances of the above from happening is very small; there IS still a chance, am I right?
    So why would you think that meeting a girl on some dating site would be any different? If anything, the probability of you getting burned would be 10 folds. 
    Oh, just in case you didn’t know, those dating sites are a haven for scammers. That holds true for all those dating sites be it for Filipinas or any other nationalities.
    I’m not saying all the girls there are, mind you. Good ones can be found there, sure but just keep in mind that those bad ones are predators & you are the prey; and predators go where there are lots to feed on.

  28. Just do you, Henry.  There’s no easy or set formulas for finding anything worthwhile in life, so most of us are just stumbling around in search of serenity.  Your fellow stumbler, Ned.   🙂

    1. @Philippine Dreams thanks, man.  hey.. if you have some time tomorrow (friday) afternoon before/after the gym, let me know.  wanted to talk some stuff over with you, get your perspective.  text me when you got time.

  29. Hello everyone..I read mostly about men’s side here..for me it’s a turn table.I don’t know how to explain but briefly..I tell my story.I’m an only child..I’m an OFW..base in Singapore..some body ask me to do online dating..feel stupid when I believe a man from u.k..he promise a lot to me..and I send a big money..but I never learn my lesson from the first guy..so I send for another guy who said his in a contract in nigeria.I’m so stupid.the last man from Serbia..he come to SG.to meet me.and he don’t like to go back to Serbia anymore..so I help him to get job here in SG.I give my new laptop to him so that easy for him to find job.I bring him to Philippine..free accommodation..but after all I did he never say “Thank You”.even to my mum.It’s been a year before I meet my fiancee..the big division for me it’s to give up my http://work.to seattle with him in Philippine.the problem is his not stable yet.which I am.I told him..to stay in Philippine with me..he no need to have money or work.just be with me.really it’s a hard decision for me if i married him.all become conjugal property..i dont have any kids..which he,had 3 kids.he got luggage..which I dont have.my mum told me..its really hard to be alone one day.

    1. I forgot to tell pls any one who wanted to see or to meet the women..to any country pls..make sure you have enough money..you bring your cards…don’t relay to a woman.Because really how if your girl doesn’t have money too..how?

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