Showing PDA in the Philippines

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    1. Boy you have that right – my girl only will wear a one piece suite – no 2 piece – she looks fantastic in the one piece but man a 2 piece would really be great. Alas no such luck

    2. That is very true. My best friend and his filipina wife of 20 years here in USA, never show public affection or even affection in their home if others are there. Another thing i learned in etiquette, is that the man always walks on the street side when you are walking down the street with your gf or wife.

    3. +LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines Reekay, I'm even surprised you two are shacking up. It depends where you live and what your girl friends profession is I suppose. PDA and living together especially a westerner you are not married to is a quick way to loose your professional job in the Philippines, especially in rural areas. A good example is a public school teacher in a rural area. PDA and living with a guy unmarried, you would be fired or worst forced to resign because the mothers would not allow their children to attend class where a woman like that is instructing. Manila, Makati places like that it may be fine, I'm not sure but not rural areas. I think there is more to the PDA thing then what you have mentioned as well. There is a majority of women who are not very experienced in PDA or bedroom stuff as a whole in Philippines especially in their early twenties (as compared to American women).

    4. I went to Quezon city a couple weeks ago to meet a woman I met on OK Cupid. She was just looking for someone close to her for friendship. I was looking for a woman anywhere and reviewing profiles. She stuck out because I thought her beautiful and messaged her Jan. 1st this year.  Needless to say, I am smitten with her and she is for me! You’ve talked before of annulments. It seems easier these days but does cost a lot of money! She treated me like a king during my visit and we still message all the time on skype. I am making the commitment to get her here to be my wife!

  1. I wish i had this information 2 years ago i was with an Indonesian woman and i didn’t think that she cared that much for me. Because she was very reserved when we were out in public and i got the impression that she was embarrassed to be with me. So i ended it and now after watching this clip i am feeling some what ignorant. I have never travelled over seas and for me this clip was very enlightening, I am 51yrs old and still learning.

    Thanks Henry and all the best from Australia 

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines the more jealous they are the deeper in love with you they are!! if you have a girl that is like whatever ditch her cuz she just wants your money!!!

    2. I know an expat who was unaware of the jealousy factor common with Filipinas.. he thought his particular first g/f there was wayyy too jealous and broke up with her.  Now that he’s been in the PH over 7 years, he sees it much differently and would have probably given her a bit of patience on it.  But.. we learn a little, day by day.  Is the best we can do.  🙂

  2. This is kind of weird, maybe it’s different from place to place, here I live in Cagayan de Oro, Northern Mindanao, it’s the exact opposite of what you just described, couples usually show affection in public here, and my wife even complains that I’m not showing enough affection when we’re out. hehe.. I guess it’s different depending on the place you’re at. Smaller cities may be much more conservative than the bigger cities. 

    1. I am from CDO and I hate pda. It’s awkward and it makes me uncomfortable seeing them doing it. It is something that they shouldn’t be doing in public.

    2. +Itamei Panday You’re probably right about that. Smaller cities or in the suburbs or province, people may be a lot more conservative than inside the bigger cities..

    3. +Skauber CDO? Maybe in town but go just out side of CDO to places like Alubijid and they can be very conservative people. Kagayanon’s are overall very conservative people.

  3. Might be true for you but I never had this except once in Phil. Younger generation have more “open”, western views? I’m talking about…..20 girls I met perhaps. Been city girls though…that usually speeds “westernizement” up.

    1. Yah.. city girls (like those in Cebu) are a bit more Westernized.  Even so, when around their family they tone it down a bit.  ha!

  4. Another good video! When we lived in Dumaguete we could always tell who were the NEW GUYS in town visiting there philippina penpals. The girls would have both hands holding onto one arm of the american boyfiend. The joke was ” hold on tight Di , don’t let someone steel him away” !  You videos ar excellent they are getting the word out loud and clear. At our last sunday get together, there were 6 guys married to Philippinas and 2 guys who are waiting for there K1 paperwork to be approved. And this was in Oklahoma not an area know for having alot of Philippinas!  My wife thinks your apartment in barangay Calindagan Tabuc Tubig.  Near city high school.///////

  5. ive been chatting with a young woman from dipolog for some time now, and I asked her that question, she says there ashamed doing that, why I don’t know, also she says in bigger citys like manila the girls r more westernized and they do that I guess.

  6. That’s interesting . I have had 3 girls there over a few years , not bar girls and could not get their hand away from mine . But the bathing suit thing is spot on . Thanks again fir the vids Henry Aloha

  7. So if she’s stalking you, she must REEAAAALLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY be in love?  LOL!

    Look guys, do NOT make excuses for psycho-bitches and other BAD behavior.  We all have emotions BUT you want a woman, NOT a little girl.  In other words, a grown-up woman can control herself–exactly as you do.

    Never lower you standards, guys.  The PH is a smorgasbord of women.  Get exactly what you want.  Never settle until you do.

  8. Hm, interesting. My Filipina wife says it is not acceptable to hold hands and show affection in public (it’s ‘a shame’, she says!). BUT, when it comes to crossing the road, she will grip my hand very tightly and help me across (after all, I am only 57 years old and don’t know how to cross the road!!!).

  9. I had a different experience in the Philippines.  I’m in a gay relationship with my Filipino boyfriend.  The first time we went to Robinson’s Mall in Malate he was a very touchy feeling type of person.  He would put his arm around me or lean on me no kissing or anything.  I kept looking around and felt a bit unsettled but no one seemed to care.  I told him that men don’t usually do that in the States but I guess it’s different in the Philippines.  

    1. Here in the PH, I always see what I presume are ‘straight’ Filipino men with arms over each other’s shoulders and even dancing together at clubs.  Not just a few times, but all the time, at the malls and streets.  Same with the women, they will go hand-in-hand or even arms around waists as they walk.  It’s like a sisterly ‘bonding’, or ‘pairing’ they do which I can only guess is part of having an accountable person around to vouch for their reputation.  Here in the PH, it’s not like the individualistic perspective I was raised with in America.  Here it is more ‘communal’.

  10. when i was there to get married,my fiance and i would be sneaky about kissing..she/we would look around,we’d see no onlookers and we’d say,”conservative” then smooch a was weird there but that is just the way it is.i prefer this than the crap people are subjected to in the usa or….where ever.

  11. hmm finally made a trip too meet fiance in phillipines.. and a lot of your blogs I watched..came to for this one..yes..
    My girl loves PDA. Rare?
    Lol..thanx again for all u do here and for inyroducing me to your friend too

  12. I agree 100% about Pinays not wearing bikinis where there are other Filipinos.  If you see a girl posed in a bikini on her FB or Tagged account, my guess is she’s an X bar girl.  I think bikinis are pretty inappropriate in the Philippines with the locals.  Just T-shirts and shorts.

    1. The other possibility (because I know several filipinas who’v done this) is because their previous boyfriend took them to another island where they felt comfortable to wear the 2-piece bikini.  Or at a resort where they knew no family would be there.  But locally, on the island where the family is.. they ‘cover up’.  🙂

  13. I was just curious about the title of this video, I thought sir you are talking about PDA which stands for “Phil. Dental Association”…But lol your talking about the East’ culture,,please sir allow me to share my insight. Being a Filipino, those who are showing their affection in public are often newly married or newly girlfriends/boyfriends (basically not yet married). Majority, couples who are settled for a long time don’t usually showed much affection publicly because it’s our belief/ traditional culture that showing such things in the public seems  attempting to catch the surroundings’ attention.  It’s just like such thing is not included in our public etiquette. You have all the time for that gestures at home (I mean private) but show less in public.

    1. I understand your explanation.  I guess that’s why it seems strange to us Westerners, because we aren’t concerned with the surroundings.  If we feel like showing affection, we show it.  Does not matter if it’s the house or public.  Just different ways of thinking that foreigners need to be aware of before they move here, so they don’t get the wrong idea.. thinking their Filipina g/f doesn’t like them.

  14. Well I’m rooting for April anyway but that’s another video. Well I am very fortunate because my sweetie too LOVES holding hands in public. That was one of her big things that she get a guy that was not afraid to hold her hand in public. Her words. And yet she too is VERY conservative with the beach and bikini thing. So I lucked out because I too like PDA very much. No of course we’re not doing things that would make one holler “go get a room” but we enjoy holding and a light peck here and there.

  15. Another very interesting video Henry…Very informative also…
    I am sure I am not the first to mention this. I would love to see interviews with  US/Ph couples to get their views. Hopefully a full series 🙂

  16. Different people react differently. My wife has always been very close to me in public … like she is glued to my arm from day one. We are only a couple months apart in age (she’s older), too. We were 39 when we met … 15 years ago.

  17. And with the same sex they actual display more affection in public then westerners. You will see best friends holding hands (women) and men will arms around their buddies shoulders etc in public.

  18. I will admit, as I said in other posts, I will do a couple hand holding, or play with her hair, but a lot of it is not done, also, by me, because it is to darn crowded..My wife wants more pecks on the cheek, nibble the ear, or a slap on the butt, but, there is no room and yes, for some reason, these people think, that only foreigner rent girls, or go to bard, and it is not true…Before we can change the misconception, we need to first stop the true conceptions…Even if you are with a prostitute or bar girl, you should still make her dress nice, treat her good, and show her respect, because you know what…She is doing this, giving up her dignity to support her family back home, so they not have to live a life she lives…I have talked to bar girls, and nothing makes you cry faster than to see one drop her professional guard and begin to cry..You need to study this culture and know how dirty they feel, already and they not need you to make it worse…Please, PDA is for married couples, in moderation, and with dignity and when with a bar girl, dignity is even more important

  19. I just subscribed. I will be an expat soon myself. Doing as much research as I can including spending time with, and learning from, a philipina and her husband here in my home town. I have been looking into all kinds of things such as the retirement VISA, scams (airport security bullet scam and wrapping luggage in plastic), cost of living, traditions etc. You are a wealthe of information and it is appreciated.

  20. Yes i even had a girfriend here in california before i got married and she still avoided me for a kiss but i understood did some reaserch and yea its a cultural thing becasue the woman if there raised by mom are very influenced by mom and she teaches her daughter how to behave even talks about p d a . so now that im married to my wife now we only get crazy in our room i canhardly wait when she gets here to the states .. thanks man it was educational.

  21. I found that it was a big adjustment for me. My first experience was strange that we would not hug or kiss in public. Even after our engagement, I played by the Filipino rules. Trust me when I say she will make up for the public time in private. accept the shyness and reap the benefits later

  22. French kissing here in the Philippines in the public, is the one thts “taboo” ive never seen any or probably if ive seen one, cnt even remember when 🙂 holding hands most especially girlfriends and boyfriends and sometimes married couple are a common thing here to my observation 🙂

  23. It may be helpful, when referring to bar girls, to explain what a bar girl is. I take infer, from the mention of “a bar girl, or [possibly] a prostitute…” that being a bar girl can be different from being a prostitute.
    I had thought that bar girls were just prostitutes that were set up with business arrangements, to solicit in bars, and that prostitutes, otherwise, were streetwalkers

  24. Im gonna be going to manila in a fee months. Have had this very conversations with my Filipina. Lol she says no holding hands in jeepney or in public. This topic is very interesting.

  25. Yes I found this to be true, in one way people in the Philippines don’t seem to have the same “personal space ” thing that we do in the U.S.

    Now my fiancee will hold hand in public, but she said it’s not proper to be “too sweet” .

    But I’m good with it because I think in the west many go to far with PDA.

  26. My Filipina is from a small island and she’s more affectionate in public than I am. Its kind of embarrassing sometimes because she’s all over me!

  27. OK, so wait… She doesn’t want to be “seen” as being that kind of girl? So what about all of the 18 (or so) year old unmarried girls walking around with babes in their bellies? What then? At this point, there’s NO speculation. It’s very black and white real.

  28. I went to Cebu City in 1964 while in the Navy. A friend aboard ship was a Filipino (E4 Steward) who took me to see his home. I was surprised to see a number of male friends holding hands while walking down the street. My friend was very emphatic about them not being gay, it was just what friends did – a cultural difference. Is it still prevalent that male friends will hold hands walking down the street? I don’t see it in any of your videos.

    1. i don’t know about then, but on the one hand, i’ve seen the young men dancing with each other because the girls only want to meet expats.

      but i’ve also seen trike drivers kissing their obviously gay b/f out on the public streets. and that was in a small town, not the big city.

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